I remember we was the best of friends

I remember we was the best of friends. I use to like your sister who was a few years older than me but she had nooo interest in me what so ever. Then i met you other sister and you she was a little crazy so i didn’t talk to her much but you..you was different from the both of them. We connected instantly, had long talks, and long walks. You wasn’t interested in me neither but i wasn’t trying to get with you i liked having a friend like you by my side. I remember times i use to joke about your name and your height ha good times. There were times where you needed me i was always there no matter what it was like when this guy wouldn’t leave you alone or take the hint and you told him you had a boyfriend and used me as such that day we shared our 1st real real kiss to prove to someone we was together when we wasn’t. I loved to hug you ever chance i had i you get a hug because you hugged me like you loved me i felt idk complete when ever it happened and you would always tell me I had the most worm hugs ever. Then i moved never heard from you again, until last year and you dont even acknowledge my existence.

Me and my cousin play mabinogi, im on the right

I really just like snapping photos lol

Dream Catcher

Ill be making one once i have the money for the materials, ima make a dream catcher necklace and i cant wait.

Being artsy

I cant remember when i started drawing i think ive been doing it all of my life, the music came along and i started messing around with that, and then taking photos. Ive always been this way im a very artsy person i learn from touch and experimenting not from someone pointing and talking. This makes it hard for me to learn the "normal way" if thats what you want to call it but i enjoy being artsy because its not something everyone has i still have things to learn but it will come when its time.

i also uploaded this to my tumblr

Give me the strength

To study and learn for once so i can get my GED. I have been holding it off for to long and i need it not just so i can get a job but so i can get into some art schools and learn as much as i can. I want degrees in so many things, Photography, Digital Design, Music Engineering, and even drawing. Im not trying to better myself for anybody but myself because nobody is gonna help me anyways.

It took me some time to realize some things, the only thing i regret is dropping out of school but i have my reasons and they are very legit but im stubborn and i know i am. I dont want to do anything people want me to do, if you think its best for me 9 x out of 10 ill tell you its not because in the long run you may be looking out for me but right now your looking out for you. This is my life im going to do things my regardless if you like it or not why? because we only live once, time is short, we dont know what comes tomorrow, and i live my life for myself.

Granted i should have dont alot of things smarter but as i got a lil older (now) i understand what i need to do and i can feel it. I actually want to educate myself to an extent and accomplish the things i want to accomplish so i can feel like ive done what ive always wanted to do. I refuse to be one of these working people who dont live there dreams, IM A DREAMER i will push with the right recourses around and some money to get me the places i need to go. Right now that starts with me getting my ged so i hope and pray that at least by the end of this yeah ill be ready to take this test and have this milestone complete.

Current Goals

• Finish Studying GED
• Get an acoustic guitar and learn to play
• Get my GED
• Get a student loan
• Buy a pro cannon camera
• Get into art school for photography

Christmas Gifts

My mom bought me something like in the middle of November. The UPS man came and it was a long and wide box (stop smiling) but it wasn't heavy at all. Funny thing is i haven't asked her for anything of hinted that i want anything this year. Its scary i hope im not disappointed by the hype because we all are probably getting no more than 2 gifts. The money just isn't here this year if i had a job id help out best i could.

Is there a reason for liking this photo? lol

Drug Rug?

So ive seen a friend of mine with one of these hoodys and i asked her what is it called because i definitely plan on getting me one she told me its called a drug rug. My face was like O_O i didnt really believe her so i looked it up and well i found it haha. Man i would love to get my hands on one of these i guess so as i get some money ill purchase one. They're like anywhere from 12-25 dollars online like amazon or ebay it would be nice to get one for Christmas heres an actual link to the drug rug that i would get!

Anybody ready for xmas like i am?

Taking things slow

I dont ever wanna take things to fast i've done that enough in my life its time to take things slow. This goes for anything but this post is mainly about relationships, they scared me now-a-days and im better off taking things slow before jumping into one. I hope anybody who would like a relationship can understand this chances are if you do eventually we can make things happen.

Im aware of how goofy i look lol

i think i have finally accepted the fact that ill never find someone, i dont think its worth putting my all into if its not leading up to anything nor do i want to use people as a place holder just to feel in an empty part of me for a short time id rather be single then do that feel me? if nobody wants me because they dont want a real relationship then oh well i think im finally ok with being single because nobodys worth waiting for in my eyes if you dont want it now, by time you do want it ill have a change of heart feel me?

I want to quit writing and recording music

It isnt me i just dont feel like its me and i haven't felt like its me for a long time now. I use to be so into it like i loved it but not any more im very rarely happy with anything i record now and days, and nothing ever changes. Im still doing the same thing i was doing when i started (started recording at 15) writing to soundclick beats or to industry beats, recording, editing, and posting on the net. I get no kind of results honestly i think i only have 50 fans (if that) I have 400 followers on tumblr (800 on my last one i deleted) but none of you followed for my music none of you even know i do music other than a few. To go as far as to say i suck is crazy because i dont believe i suck at making music and writing lyrics not when you have people like soulja boy, new boyz, waka flaka, guccie mane, oj, rick ross, and many others who are signed.
I think im "out of touch" with music because of the lack of results i never wanted to be famous i just wanted to be seen and for people to like what i make but it seems that isnt for me. Im tired so tired of grinding, pushing, writing, recording, and all for 3 people to say "yoo this is tight". Ive had people come up to me and tell me i had raw talent, im gonna be famous, im amazing at what i do but its all false thx to the results of what ive earned over the years as far as fans and support. If you did listen to my music thx i appreciate it but it isnt for me.
I feel like im recording now just to past time because i have nothing better to do. Once i find me a job and make a few moves ill probably never record again Hopefully ill be to busy to record anything. I do wanna thank Angel Haze, Shizzy Shy, MR. MOB, Spade (chris hooks), and philly blunt for being behind me and having my back all this time. Mr. MOB cuzzo im SME till i die you know all you gotta do is ask. Angel anything you need i got you same goes to philly, shy and my cousin spade. I need to break away from this music thing as far as rapping goes. I want to learn the guitar though just so i can play when im bored or something ive always loved the guitar. BUT yeah anyways thats all i wanted to say.

2 new self self portrait

Afro Samurai

So i promised a friend of mine i would draw Afro Samurai, It wasnt as hard as it looked idk the hair an the headband is the most painful part for me the rest was nothing. Of course i didnt shade it like the actual artwork or anything i was scared of messing up the image with to much so i kept it clean and simple"ish". I think the drawing came out reeeaally well hope you do too. Click the image to make it larger (i think lol) please leave comments id like to hear what you all think.

Walmart brand hat i want a better one

my

When i write music

I never put myself in it anymore i mean as far as feelings go yeah i do but as far as the song itself no. My inspirations are artist like Kanye, Blu, Common, J cole, Drake, Little Brother, Nappy Roots, and Slum Vill. Im in love with the conscience music. If you hear my music you will not hear that sound mainly because im not supplied with soulful/underground instrumentals. Maybe one of these days ill get to my sound 100% and make the music i love to hear i would love that.

Thanks Giving

I don't think me and my family are gonna do to much today for thanks giving possibly just lay back enjoy each others company and eat. We normally take a trip up to Maryland and spend time with other family members but this year we just don't have the money and we have other issues that wont allow us to take a long drive. Im not going to sit here all day like this day is that much different than the last because this year it isnt. Anyways happy thanks giving to everybody! Maybe ill use this time to catch up on my native american history since i have quite a bit of it flowing threw my bloodline.

Photo from today man my hair is getting long

1 CRUSH

I use to have a crush on this one girl “back in the day” she was and still is very cute. We flirted alot back then became close and all but nothing happened idky but it was nothing to pursue back then i guess. We reconnected about a year ago i believe, became close, flirted, you know the whole nine yards. My boy told me to watch out for her she acts one way but reacts another. Well i wanted to see for myself its just who i am i cant take someones word for anything without seeing for myself because things can work out differently for someone else.

Well like i said we reconnected, had cute talks and shit. She said she liked me a whole lot and i said the same, well problem is she flirted with everybody i mean EVERYBODY. I didn’t trip about it because its what my boy warned me about she would tell you something like your the only one but then you can easily catch her saying that to someone else. There would be times she called me boo, love, and babe but then there was random times where shed just say nick and she would seem off.

Idk so i ended it before anything got crazy because what my boy said was true. She acts as if your her main man, but she tells every man that and shes not this dime girl she just cute maybe a 7 out of a 10. It was the fact that she craved so much attention not from you or any one person but from everyone. lol so i wrote my boy on facebook told him he was right and thanks for looking out